Effusions
by Coley Merrin
Summary: KuroFai It wasn't hope that Fai felt from Kurogane... it was expectation. shonenai. Collection of ficlets, some with spoilers for recent manga chapters. Angst, fluff, and perhaps more.
1. Effusion spoilers

This is going to be a collection of bits that I have been doing, none of which are very polished, but some which are longer than this.

**There could be spoilers!**

A spoiler tag will be marked with the titles after this first chapter. I am assuming general knowledge of anime/manga, and that spoilers rely on events of manga chapters in the 120s and onwards.

Also, fair warning that **shonen-ai,** while not always explicitly present, could show up at any moment that it strikes me. I'd rather not hear how the pairing is wrong, or why one character deserves something else, or someone else. We all have our preferences, and this is just fiction, okay? And I think that's all you need out of me. :)

**Effusion** (spoilers)

by: Coley Merrin

Series: Tsubasa

Pairing: Kurofai, more or less or more.

Warnings: Well. Drama. And spoily theme from the recent manga chapters (120 or so-?). I know everyone, their brother, and their neighbor's dog has done, and will do, this straight into the ground, but we'll forget that for now.

* * *

He could smell the tang of blood, even from where he pressed against Kurogane, in the hollow between his shoulder blades. There was the scent of him there, the hint of warmth, the comforting musk of sweat. Fai imagined that it was a lingering scent of his own hair that he smelled, mixed in the cloth on Kurogane's still back, as though he had been there before.

Blood like finger paints spread over skin, a tattoo of malicious design, a wound of option. It was so terribly hard when dark fingers wiped blood off his grimacing lips, blood that rightfully belonged to those fingers. It was like being a child again, dependent on a mother for life. And much like a mother's hands, Kurogane gripped him, held him away from a brink that he knew no better than to drift towards, and waited for Fai to choose to reach back. But it wasn't hope that Fai felt from Kurogane... it was expectation. As though somehow the force of Kurogane's being would make Fai see what was right.

Kurogane shifted slightly in sleep, the hilt of the sword rattling slightly with the movement. Fai breathed again, hearing the steady thud of Kurogane's heart. It was this sound that washed away the taste of Kurogane's blood, and only this sound that made Kurogane's hands a comfort and not a curse. It turned away his resentment, and gave him hope of his own. If Kurogane's heart still beat, it meant that Fai had not stolen everything. Even if it had been given. For one beat, two, three, their hearts beat in unison, and then countered again, like the ebb and flow of a tide, give and return. But not death.

Not by those hands.

Do you like pain, Kuro-sama..?


	2. Flash

Definitely one of the shortest of the ones that I have done...

Flash

by...Coley Merrin

Series: Tsubasa

Pairing: Kurofai, more or less or more.

Warnings: I seem to have an obsession with blood of late, ahem. Forgive me. No spoilers (that I know of...).

* * *

The knife slid out of his flesh like fire, and no amount of sound or silence eased it until every bit of metal had cleared his skin. Blood welled in the void on his arm, dripping from the knife in candle-wax puddles on his skin. He startled Fai out of his momentary hesitation, and the hand wavered that held the knife . Clean, bandage, and smooth, erasing all traces of blood, of wounds, but for the lingering pain.

"I've had worse," Kurogane said, pushing away the lingering questions that lurked behind Fai's lips.

"Not when I was the one to take it out of your flesh. Are you all right, Kuro-san?"

He couldn't sleep while someone was touching him, couldn't relax this close. He closed his eyes and let himself relax, feeling his breath return in great gulps as his head rested against Fai's stomach. Fai pinched his ear, and Kurogane growled, hearing the hum of relief from Fai. The danger had passed, the bloodied knife still within reach, and he would only rest a moment.


	3. Hand Spun spoilers

I apologize for the shortness of these, but in the writing it kind of ended up that way. There are a couple coming up that are longer, so this trend will be reversing.

Hand Spun

by: Coley Merrin

Rating: Err...PG? T? Whatever is being used lately. I guess.

Warnings: Angst, and spoilers for late happenings if you're really reading closely. What is this angst monster, and how can I make it stop? Not kidding.

Still don't own Tsubasa...

* * *

"Do you think I couldn't do it?" Fai asked, gripping the knife in his hand hard enough for his knuckles to whiten, bringing it slowly to rest against Kurogane's neck, dreamily almost. "Do you think I couldn't end it?"

"Could you?" Kurogane leaned forward, his eyes steady on Fai's face so that he could see the widening eye, the shock, the denial, the fear, as he realized that the knife point slid through layers of skin and into Kurogane's flesh. Fai yanked the knife away, threw it so it clattered against the wall, ricocheting until it came to rest by their feet, spinning, with the faintest shine of blood on the tip.

Fai's hand vised around Kuogane's wrist before the man could touch him. "No." His lips twisted, a mockery of a smile. "I can't." He turned, left, as the knife spun slowly to a halt.


	4. Dreams

**Dreams**

by: Coley Merrin

Series: Tsubasa

Pairing: Kurofai, more or less or more.

Rating: G, woohoo

Warnings: No spoilers...Fluff. Haha. Woohoo, general angst monster is defeated for the moment. Counting down till the next one bites. 104,000 left to go. Oh yeah, I remember why I liked writing angst. -- Blah.

* * *

Fai sank into the chair across from Kurogane, vertebrae popping as he relaxed into it.

"I took the kids in some blankets," he said in answer to Kurogane's silent question. "We're settling in again."

Kurogane rasied an eyebrow at the discontent in that statement, and returned to the book. Fai shifted, shifted again. His back cracked again, his neck popped, and the chair squeaked as his weight again shifted, bringing a scowl to Kurogane's face.

"What is your problem."

"Kuro-pii, I thought you'd never ask."

Fai hopped up and in one stride made it to Kurogane's chair. Kurogane could do little but watch as Fai, all grace and limbs, scooted onto the chair with him. Fai's back pressed up against the armrest, half leaning against Kurogane, his legs dangling off the other side. Letting his hand rest against Kurogane's chest, he turned an expectant gaze on Kurogane, who was staring back somewhat short of disbelief.

"What..."

"Isn't that what people do when they have troubles? Curl up on Daddy's lap?"

"I'm not your daddy! What do you want?"

Fai let his head rest back against Kurogane's arm.

"Nothing."

"Then why come over here?!"

Fai's mouth tilted up at the corners.

"Well, you asked, Kuro-sama."

Kurogane's moved his arm halfheartedly, failing in dislodging Fai, and certainly in discouraging him. All it took a quiet look, and Kurogane was already defeated.

It was not so much Fai's fault that he fell asleep as he counted Kurogane's heartbeats against his fingertips. It also wasn't Kurogane's fault, if when he heard Fai's breathing change he moved his arm closer - not to hold, no - but to make sure Fai didn't fall. Fai would wake soon, he knew, and move but for just that moment the warmth lulled Kurogane, and he laid his head back, and slipped into the comfort of it. And a blond head, free in dreams, slipped closer.


	5. You and Me spoilers

**You and Me**

by: Coley Merrin

Series: Tsubasa

Pairing: Kurofai, more or less or more.

Rating: K+? T? Something?

Warnings: Pseudo-spoilers for recent manga. Angst-monster returns.

* * *

He inhaled sharply, shrinking from Fai's fingers as he touched, smearing his hands with blood as he pressed down on wounds too numerous for Fai to cover on his own.

"If it... At least if it were this way, you don't have to make a choice." Kurogane inhaled again feeling the pain become part of his consciousness.

"No!

"Tell me that you want to live."

"I want you to live! You haven't gotten back."

"I never was," Kurogane said, his eyes closing halfway, "without you."

Fai hissed, feeling a tear sneak out, and watched it roll down the side of Kurogane's neck. He pressed more cloth against Kurogane's side.

"Don't speak as if you've given up."

"The princess? The kid?"

"Fine, he's caring for her."

"So it's just you and me, then."

"You and me."

"It's not a mortal wound," Kurogane said, pressing his hand up against Fai's where it staunched the blood of the largest wound.

"But it could have been."

"Then you'll come with me?"

Fai stared hard at Kurogane's hand covering his own.

"You'll live."

Kurogane let out a harsh chuckle. "You hardly give an inch." At the smile he saw in Fai's eyes he quieted. "It's a start."

Kurogane's hand did not move from Fai's until after Syaoran returned for them, and his relief at seeing Kurogane awake kept him from noticing. And as for Fai, he did not move either, not even to wipe the blood that trickled from the fine cuts that were scattered over Kurogane's chest, because it seemed that no matter what his movement, Kurogane saw through to a deeper meaning that Fai had always wished hidden. And as Fai sat calm in his presence and under his touch, this time was no different.


	6. Tumbler

Tumbler

by: Coley Merrin

Series: Tsubasa

Pairing: Kurofai, more or less or more. With a guest appearance by Touya and Yukito.

Disclaimer: I neither own Tsubasa, nor make money from it. But very glad it exists.

* * *

Fai tipped his glass with a fingertip, catching images on the surface of the dark and biting liquid. He could see the shadows of the people behind him as they moved, melting across the faces of the bottles on the wall as though they were trapped inside of them. He was not drunk, could not be drunk, as his glass was still more than half full, and it had not been that full to begin with.

The bartender reached for the glass, but Fai's hand went out to stop him.

"Are you going to drink it or play with it?"

Fai gave a small smile and went back to tracing the rim of his glass in silence.

Kurogane turned away to see the princess's brother... or the version of him in this world anyway... looking at him.

"Is he all right?" Touya asked.

Kurogane shrugged and threw his rag into the sink. His eyes followed Touya's to where Yukito cleared tables. Yukito smiled when he noticed, and waved. Touya raised his eyebrows at Kurogane who frowned and turned away, unfortunately right back towards Fai. There was a melancholy smile on the mage's face, almost as if he were waiting for his glass to smile back. Kurogane scowled and ignored it for as long as he could. He wasn't even sure why Fai had come with him. The kids were next door and safe, but Fai had been... less than eager to sit in his presence. Not easily, or lightly. His conclusion was that Fai had followed him over for the alcohol but he was not drinking any more enough than to wet his mouth. And at the far end of the bar, he didn't come for the company. Yukito had been the only one besides Kurogane to go to him. They had sat together a couple of minutes, and Fai had sent him off with a happy, fake smile.

Kurogane set his clean glasses down with a snap. An hour to closing and Fai might as well have been a statue. He filled a glass, this time of his own choosing, and snatched away the glass Fai had been playing with before. He allowed no arguments, and slid the new glass up to Fai's poised hand. Fai peered down at the dark red liquid - juice, instead of alcohol - and wiped a drop from the rim. It was bright and red against the pale skin.

"Looking out for me?" Fai murmured, bringing the glass to his lips and turning away to seek out another seat.

Kurogane turned again and saw there had been witnesses to the exchange, Yukito leaning against the bar across from Touya. Yukito gave an encouraging smile, while Touya smirked - just barely, as if he felt he were in on some secret at Kurogane's expense. And yet, it was knowing, too.

Fai had not gone far, just far enough to sit in a booth where his glass was free from Kurogane's hands. But he sat facing the bar, able to see Kurogane without obstruction. And Kurogane could see him. But it had been a long time since Fai had doubted that.


End file.
